The Power Couple Method

A Revolutionary Way to Solve Your Relationship Problems

The Power Couple Method (PCM) is a fast-acting form of relationship therapy that helps couples de-escalate conflict, foster kindness and create satisfying, long-lasting relationships. PCM creates positive change and gives you practical tools immediately based on the latest findings of neuroscience and the study of human bonding. This knowledge reveals how relationships really work, how they get off-track and what it takes to make them thrive. 

PCM integrates a deep assessment of your relationship and draws from an extensive toolbox of interventions grounded in cutting-edge research. You and your partner can get both immediate relief and ongoing strategies that can make you independent of the need for long-term therapy. PCM helps you and your partner get out of pain and rediscover the love that first brought you together.

PCM Gets to the Root of the Problem

Have you tried couples therapy in the past but just couldn’t seem to make any progress? 

Couples who report having experienced ineffective couples therapy often have the same complaint: After a lot of time, energy and expense, the therapist had not provided them with a clear direction of exactly what they were supposed to be doing differently in their relationship. As a result, nothing really changed. 

PCM is different. 

PCM represents a significant advancement in the field of couples therapy because it works on the deepest, most instinctual levels of the human experience. At Power Couples Counseling, we understand relationships and what partners need to get out of pain. Right from the very beginning of the therapy process, we get to the heart of your problems and get you moving in a positive direction. Once you’ve identified what’s causing the pain, you’ll discover exactly what you need to do to thrive together. 

We have a clear vision of where we are taking you and the roadmap you need to get there!

PCM Addresses the Issues that Couples Face Everyday

  • Communication: Get the specific skills you need to talk about even your most difficult issues.
  • Affairs: Repair infidelity and rebuild trust.
  • Money issues: Resolve differences in how you spend money.
  • Pornography: Heal the hurt and establish ground rules that work.
  • Betrayal: Recover from major lies, secrets, embezzlement of money, and other relationship traumas.
  • Fighting: Master the ability to fight fair without it ever getting scary or dangerous.
  • Parenting: Get on the same page and parent as a team.
  • Sex: Create intimacy and make agreements about sexual choices that work for both of you.
  • Workaholism: Balance work with relationship and family life.
  • In-laws: Make agreements about how you want your families of origin to be involved in your life as a couple.
  • Step families: Bring your kids together to create a new, harmonious tribe.

The Science Behind The Power Couple Method

PCM integrates the fields of affective neuroscience and attachment science to help you solve your relationship problems. This knowledge base allows PCM therapists to accurately assess the nature of your conflict and determine a precise path forward.

Affective Neuroscience

PCM utilizes the revolutionary findings of neuroscientist, Dr. Jaak Panksepp and the field of research he developed called Affective Neuroscience — the brain science of emotion.

In a nutshell, this ground-breaking research reveals that there are seven ancient circuits which Dr. Panksepp termed action systems deep in the center of your brain. These action systems serve as the command centers for how you think, feel and behave in all areas of your life — including your relationship.

The Seven Action Systems of Your Brain

  1. SEEKING: The “grandaddy” of all the action systems, your SEEKING system is constantly motivating you to go out into the world and get the resources you need to keep you alive — including human connection.
  2. RAGE: Fighting for and protecting yourself, your loved ones, and your resources.
  3. FEAR: Avoiding danger and threat.
  4. LUST: Pinpointing potential partners and reproducing.
  5. CARE: Nurturing your loved ones.
  6. PANIC/GRIEF: Staying connected to those who matter.
  7. PLAY: Learning together through joy and fun.
The wisdom of these brain circuits has been encoded in your nervous system over millions of years of evolution. You share these ancient instincts with all mammals. Their purpose is to move you toward life-giving experiences and away from harmful ones. 

What do the action systems have to do with your relationship?


Everything!

These areas of your brain, when activated, can either make you feel terrible or utterly in love.

When you feel emotionally threatened or disconnected in your relationship, it can over-activate certain circuits and deactivate other ones. When FEAR, RAGE and PANIC/GRIEF are activated, you feel miserable, alone, and ready to call it quits. Before you know it, all hell breaks loose. Reason goes out the window. You and your spouse find yourselves acting in ways you later regret. On the other hand, when CARE and PLAY are activated, the warm feelings return, and couples feel more open to physical intimacy. 

Discovering how to balance each other’s action systems is the real source of healing in relationships. 

The Power Couple Method is explicitly designed to bring both of your brains into balance as a couple, getting you out of distress and creating peace and harmony between you.

PCM Teaches You and Your Partner How to Balance Each Other’s Brains

In your PCM sessions, you and your partner will discover how to:

  • Eliminate FEAR
  • Remove RAGE
  • CARE for each other
  • Avoid triggering PANIC and GRIEF
  • PLAY together
  • SEEK intimate connection with one another instead of outside of the relationship
  • LUST for each other

Attachment Science

Attachment science is the knowledge of how we bond with the special people in our lives.

An enormous body of research proves that you form a relationship blueprint based on your interactions with your parents when you are small. This blueprint is your attachment style. It informs how you behave in your intimate relationships when you become an adult.

What sets PCM apart is that you get customized tools that are designed to work for each of you in your unique relationship. And there’s a science to understanding how you work!

Many people did not experience emotionally safe and secure relationships as children, which tends to create problems for them in their adult intimate relationships.

Your relationship experiences in early life are what pattern your action systems, teaching you what to FEAR, what to SEEK in life, and what to RAGE about.

PCM uses attachment science to help you and your partner understand each other’s relationship blueprints. You discover exactly what each of you needs to feel safe, loved and secure.

The Power Couple Method Mindset

PCM helps you and your partner create a Relationship Refuge — a place of total safety and security just for the two of you, that is free from emotional threat.

In order to do this, PCM teaches you to recognize and eliminate any behavior that either partner finds threatening. When problems do arise, you’ll know how to turn toward each other and relieve each other’s suffering.

Deciding to put your partner’s distress-relief and well-being first before everything else will give you the foundational mindset you need to succeed!

A couple attending a PCT counseling session

What the First PCM Couples Therapy Session Looks Like

At the first session, your therapist will take the time to hear from each of you. They will get to know how each of you see your problems or concerns, as well as your strengths as a couple.

It’s important that your therapist get an idea of everything going on in your relationship, before providing any guidance.

For this reason, the first session is three hours in length, to allow for this in-depth look. You will come away from the first session with a greater understanding of what is causing your relationship problems and what you need to do to remedy the situation right away.

Many couples notice improvements in their relationship immediately.

Next Steps

A couple embracing each other kissing forehead

You might feel that you and your partner just don’t know how to talk about your relationship problems. Or you may be wondering if you are with the right person and considering divorce counseling.

We understand. There is no need to live in doubt. Take the simple step of acknowledging that the two of you need help to get out of the spiral of conflict and negativity. You deserve to have a great relationship. With PCM, you can end the tension and look forward to the future, together. We invite you to reach out to us.

Our founder, Gabrielle Usatynski, is a Licensed Professional Counselor and relationship expert in Colorado. She has been a couples therapist in private practice for over a decade. She is the founder of Power Couples Education, where she trains therapists worldwide. She has been featured in numerous publications, including USA Today, Cosmopolitan, Counseling Today, and Women’s Health. Her book, The Power Couple Formula, will be released later this year. She is happily married to her husband and love of her life, Ted.

Happy couple smiling
Learn more about couples therapy with The Power Couple Method.

Get more information about training in the Power Couples Method for mental health professionals through Power Couples Education.

If you would like to explore couples therapy with us, please click the button below to set up your initial 60-minute consultation so we can find out about your goals and how we can help.